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It happened while in the car with the Roos.
In the spirit of it officially being December, I dug out a few Christmas CDs. Yes, I’m one of THOSE people who love holiday music (except for God-awful diddies like Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree and anything from Mariah Carey).
With Big Roo being almost four this season, I figured he’d be interested in learning some Christmas songs.
We started off with Up on the Housetop. Big Roo got a kick out of the “click click click” part and I began explaining how Santa goes down the chimney to deliver presents.
We then moved to Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.
And that’s when it went all to hell.
I belted out the lyrics really loud so Big Roo could hear them in the back seat. It started off normally…
You know Dasher and Dancer and Donner and Blitzen…
I sang through the first verse or so. Then, it starts hitting me. I’m creating Christmas memories for Big Roo right this very moment, ones that he’ll actually remember. Before this year, I think it was mostly for me, as I doubt he’ll remember making cookies, opening presents and decorating the tree when before he was three. Those memories will only live in pictures to him.
I kept singing…
And if you ever saw him,
you would even say it glows…
I got all ponderous about how Daddy Roo and I will be shaping his vision of Santa Claus. I’m finding that it’s strange being on the parenting side of Santa. Seems like such a lie. But then I remember all the magic surrounding Santa when I was little and I want the same magic for the Roos.
Big Roo’s eyes start lighting up when I tell him about Santa. No way I’m killing that twinkle.
All of the other reindeer
used to laugh and call him names…
How will we tell the kids Christmas stories about Jesus? How will we integrate pieces of my Hispanic heritage into our family traditions? How will I capture our memories in photographs and writing down sentiments? How will we teach them that giving in more important than receiving?
They never let poor Rudolph
join in any reindeer games…
Then came thoughts about the traditions we’re building as a family. New pajamas on Christmas Eve, leaving cookies out for Santa, making gullets (it’s a cookie), Big Roo telling Santa what he wants for Christmas (which today he told me he only wants one present and then proceeded to mention he wanted a shiny The King, shiny McQueen and two Chick Hicks. He then said he wants those wrapped into ONE present. Clever AND hysterical.)
Then one foggy Christmas Eve,
Santa came to say…
I get visions of the Roos looking out the window for Santa, running down the stairs on Christmas morning to see colorful packages under the tree, playing with their new toys all day as the fragrances of dinner waft through the house.
“Rudolph with your nose so bright
won’t you guide my sleigh tonight…”
At this point, all these thoughts and more culminate and my voice cracks. I let the song do the singing as I take a deep breath and let a tear or two leave my eyes.
Re-cap… Building memories. As a family. Knowing Big Roo will remember Christmases from here on out. Better make it count.